well, it seems da title gave away da mood I am in, yes very gloomy, why? mesh 3arfa why.... is it because after 3 years of having 8:30 to 5, 6 days a week job and now I don't? is it because I am in a stage where I don't know what da heck I am going to do with so much freaking free time? I mean, it's was great until, I got stuck in this big boring circle, ok, first of all, I never quit my company, so "they are working on bringing me back as a part-timer" so that makes me not knowing what to do... I got two job offers that I turned down "willingly" because I don't want to commit to anyone as for right now cuz me and DaStars are planning or new year getaway, so whoever hires me won't be happy to give me that early vacation which is going to be in a month!....so I try to keep busy, ...I wonder, where is all my friends??? was I that busy in da past three years that I am out of da social loop? I mean I have so many close friends, but why don't I keep in touch with them? why don't I visit them or they visit me? am I that boring? the only thing I want to do is hangout with DaStars I mean he is my best friend, he makes me laugh all the time, his care and company is indescribable, so during da weekends we try to do as much as possible....during da weekdays, I am bored out of my head until he gets back from work...my phone never rings, and oh I have 2 phones now, Madar and Libyana, and no one calls me, simply because I don't call them, I am such a loser....
my finances are so screwed up back in Canada, I have false charges on my visa that I ignored for ages and now they are back to bite me hard, I mean it's not like I ever used that money, but the visa company wants me to pay it....I have student loan that need to be paid, ok, I am jobless how am I supposed to pay it?....can I just send them a letter saying that I was hit by a cow?? for them to forget about me?
I've never been this moody in my life, I am going through a roller coaster, I have pimples all over my face, they'r hideous, I am soooo emotional it's like PMS 24/7 .... I had a haircut that looks cute, but for god's sake I can't even blow dry my own hair, I have 12 year old cousin that know how to blow dry her mom's hair, why can't I do it, if it's that easy?
well, I kinda need to get my priorities in order, 1) deal with da financial problems, 2)look forward to da new year trip, 3) get a job or .... a baby!!!!